Ringing in the New Year...Mommy Style

Well, here it is, 4 hours and 45 minutes from 2011, and I am sitting in my living room in my sweats with C-Money, waiting on the hubster/dad to bring us dinner. It's a big night at the Holt house.

I hope you are all having a wonderful New Year's Eve, whether you're at an awesome party or you're chilling at home with your family like I am.

Here's to 2011! Cheers and Happy New Year!

Nothing to say but Epic Fail

As all 10 of you know, I started out on a quest to radically change my life for the better and started with eating clean. I knew it was foolish to start such a venture right before the holidays, but I wanted to be hardcore and decided that the holidays were not an excuse to live in gluttony and wallow in laziness. I did wonderfully through Thanksgiving and even through the first several Christmas parties. Since Christmas Eve Eve, however, I have fallen off of the clean wagon. Hard. Straight onto my fat ass.

I have nothing to say for myself except that I intend to pick right back up where I left off. I am positive that I have reversed quite a bit of the progress I made on the scale, but that is a part of the process, I suppose. Lesson learned. Again. Cannot eat like a fat ass without becoming, well, a fat ass. Shocking revelations being made here, people. Groundbreaking, really.

I don't want to say that my New Year's Resolution is to eat clean, because I made that resolution before New Year's, and that, to me, makes it more serious and permanent. No one sticks to her New Year's Resolutions, anyway. That never stops me from making them, though, so here goes:

-cook more at home
-be a better wife
-and mother
-and sister
-and daughter
-and friend
-hang out with my friends more (before I become a full blown recluse)
-go to church regularly
-work out on a regular basis
-take my lunch to work regularly
-stop complaining about my job so much (although I feel that this is an impossible goal. So far this week, I have received a letter from a client asking me to reduce the charges on her past due account, and a $10 payment on an account well into the thousands. TEN dollars. That is not a joke. I feel my hands are tied in the complaining about work department, but, nevertheless, I will try my best).

I'm pretty sure I did a written list of New Year's Resolutions last year. If I can find it, I will post it with a report card on my progress. I doubt much progress was made.

Happy New Year, everyone. Here's hoping that 2011 is going to be a good one, since I am pretty sure that the consensus for 2010 was pretty much all around bad for everyone (except for the one ray of sunshine...my sweet Carter).

I hope you all have more fun plans than I do. I plan to stay at home and ring in the new year in my pajamas with my sweet baby (who will be asleep) and my husband. I am pretty excited about not having to figure out what to wear and where to go. See what I mean about being a recluse?

Yo Mother...Nature

I can't believe that Christmas is a mere 4 days away! That is insane! Where has this year gone? I thought it would drag on, since I spent the bulk of it pregnant with my little man, but 2010 has absolutely flown by! I would greatly appreciate it if 2011 would slow it down a little so I can enjoy my baby while he is still a baby.

On the topic of Christmas, it is possible that the reason I cannot believe Christmas is this week is because it is about 60 degrees outside. What the heck, mother nature? Get it together! I saw the forecast for Christmas Eve and Day and Channel 5 News says that whatever precipitation we are getting this weekend might turn to snow that evening, but I know they are just trying to get us all excited...it is going to be far too warm for a white Christmas. Boo.

I hope you are all getting in the Christmas spirit and have a wonderful holiday season!

quickie

Upon the suggestion (insistence) of my co-worker, I am watching the season finale of Sing-Off. I have not watched any prior episodes but she knows how much I love Glee and listening to anyone who is talented at singing. You know who isn't talented? The hosts of Sing-Off. I was totally unimpressed with Ben Folds' a capella skills. Also, with each passing moment in the show, I hate Nicole Sherzinger (sp?) a little bit more. She is a silly girl. She says stupid things and she was a note hog when she sang with that Talk of the Town band. She covered runs like Mariah Carey or something. Gross. I hate when people do that. If you can sing well, you don't need to do all of that mess.

Nothing new to note on the clean eating front except that I am totally obsessed with guacamole and it is delicious on a sandwich. Subway is on board and I appreciate that. Yum. Also, Wholly Guacamole has some 100 calorie packs of guacamole and they are delicious and give a pretty good serving size of the yummy green stuff! Try them out. You are welcome.

Cheater Cheater

That's me. Cheater, cheater, junk food eater. This weekend, I deviated from the clean thing for the first time. Friday night, I went to a wedding and by the time we got to the reception, it was already 8:00. I was starving so I made the executive decision that I would punt the diet for the evening. I ate wedding food (chicken fingers, little sandwich, spinach dip, etc) and didn't even eat cake, but still, the next day, I felt like CRAP. I had the worst food hangover ever. It was worse than a hangover. My stomach was queasy all day and I didn't even drink at the wedding. I was so nervous I wouldn't be able to have fun at the Tacky Christmas Sweater party last night. (Don't worry. I had plenty of fun...too much fun, I think).

Last night was the annual Tacky Christmas Sweater Party so I obviously drank lots and lots of whiskey and some keg beer during the flip cup Olympics that occurred in my garage. It was super fun this year! Much more fun than last year, when I was pregnant and hated everyone. I did try to control myself food-wise, though, so I would not have a 10 pound gain when I weighed myself again. I had Subway before the party so I was able to skip all of the tasty party snacks, made mostly of butter. I was pretty successful. I only had a few spinach balls (that I remember). Miraculously, I was able to function today and we even had our friends Jared and Kelly and Mabel over today to play with Berry. It was nice to chill in our pjs with some friends since we were all pretty tired. It gets harder each year to recover from drinking nights. We still play the same games and have the same friends, but we're all a little older, fatter and balder and it takes a little longer to bounce back. It was fun, though!

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. I can't believe this week is Christmas! Merry Christmas everyone!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Is it me, or is this holiday season screaming by at the speed of light? I feel like I haven't even had time to sit back and enjoy the holiday season. Tonight, in hopes of getting in the holiday mood, my sister and I took C and her two girls to Bass Pro Shop to have their pictures made with Santa. It was FREE and there was no line! I was shocked. I expected the line to be hours long since I had heard the rumor that pictures with Santa were free. It is the best kept secret in Memphis, apparently.

Haley's girls were NOT excited about meeting Santa. Gracie bravely gave her gift request from about three feet away. Haha.

C$ did not care about ole SC one way or the other. I wanted to scan in his picture and upload it, but our upstairs computer where the scanner is has the blue screen of death or whatever that stinking virus is that basically kills your otherwise perfectly operating computer. SO annoying. Here are a few self portraits of me with little man after he had his picture made with St. Nick.

Ignore my face in the last picture. I am not trying to eat my child, despite the look of terror on his face. A nice lady there saw me taking self portraits and offered to take our picture. While I was telling C to "smile," she snapped the shot, hence the maniacal open-mouthed look I am sporting.

I am so excited about Christmas this year! I know that C won't know what is going on or remember this holiday, but it will be so much more fun with a baby. Plus, my sister's kids are perfect ages for a fun Christmas morning! I can't wait! Christmas is my favorite time of year. I just need to slow down and enjoy this one!

It's been a while

I know it's been a while since I posted a blog, but for those of you who were worried that I had fallen off the clean wagon, I am still sticking to it. This week, the LFC (Lawyers' Fat Club) started at work and we all weighed in. As I have said multiple times in earlier blogs, my scale has been broken pretty much since I started this whole process. I was anxious to get on the scale and see that I had dropped 15 pounds or so. Not. So. Much. I was quite disappointed to find that I had only dropped about 7.5 lbs since I started. That was a disappointment, but I am not going to let it slow me down. I think that although the author of my Eat Clean books says you do not have to count calories as long as you are eating clean, I may need to pay a little more attention to what, exactly, I am eating. What I mean by that is, I know that I am eating "clean" foods and I definitely feel better about myself, but I need to pay better attention to the carb/protein/fat ratio than I consume. I also need to step it up with my workout. I have been doing Jillian's Shred, but I have only been doing it about 4 times a week. I think I at least need to kick that up to 5 times if not 6 times a week, especially since it's only 20 minutes! There's no excuse for not doing it! I'd also like to incorporate a little walking (and eventually jogging) into the mix but since it's about 10 degrees outside, I guess that will wait since I'll have no choice but to take my little man with me!

Speaking of little man, I'm going to have to cut this blog a little short because he is ready to eat. That, and I want to fully concentrate on the biggest loser finale! Go Ada!

I stink at this

I have vowed that I would get to work at a decent time this week to show everyone how manageable this lifestyle is. I am an utter failure to you all. The bottom line is, though, it is manageable and everyone can do it. I just need to get my a$$ out of bed sometime before 7:30 to start my morning workout, cook breakfast, pack my lunch and C's diaper bag, shower, dress myself and C, drop C off at the babysitter's and get to work, approximately 20 miles away from my house.

Yesterday, my time of arrival was a somewhat improved 10:00. Today, an abysmal 10:40. In my defense, the business really slows down this time of year. Turns out, not a lot of people want to get divorced right before Christmas. Go figure. Also, not a lot of people want to pay their bills right before the holidays either. Or ever. In fact, the other day, a client (read: now ex-client) informed me that she would pay me $50 towards her $2500 and growing bill, and that she would make another payment after the holidays, if she could. IF SHE COULD!! I asked her if she expected me to work for free. She said no. I asked her if she expected me not to touch her case, call anyone, set anything, send any correspondence or call or talk to her in any way between now and then, and she said "of course not." Funny. She doesn't expect me to work for free and yet she does not intend to pay me. I do not see how these two truths can exist at the same time, but again, I am not sure that this person understands the concept of "truth." That is a blog for another day, though. Suffice it to say, she is no saint and her moral compass is a bit off, in my opinion.

Anyway, I have been following another fun blog and I wanted to share it with you all. I am still relatively new to this blogging world and I love reading new blogs! This one is called "The Front Burner." www.thefrontburnerblog.com

One negative aspect of my newfound love of everyone else's blogs: I am now painfully aware of how embarrasingly subpar my blog is. I will try and work on this, but honestly, I don't know how to make it all fancy and highlight words that link to other blogs and whatnot. I need a blog tutorial.

Not Today

My mission today: to get up earlier and get to work at a reasonable time. Status: Fail. Time of Arrival at work: 10:37. I know I can do better than that.

Meanwhile, in my adventures in clean eating, I cooked Paradise Island Bean Burgers for dinner. (recipe featured in The Eat Clean Diet Recharged). I was pretty pumped about them and really wanted them to they turn out well. Billy came into the kitchen demanding to know where the meat for tonight's meal was. When I told him there wasn't one, he acted as if I had told him we were eating a meal made of cow dung. Well guess what? Our vegetarian, meatless Paradise Island Bean Burgers were delicious! Even grumpy Billy liked them and asked for another one when he finished his first one. (he didn't get one because I have planned our meal out for the week and his second helping would've thrown everything off).

Some People

I realize that I may be the last remaining considerate driver, however, other drivers beware: I am not afraid to honk, scream at you like a madman and/or give you a hand gesture to accompany my screaming and honking. I was driving home from work today and I made the mistake of driving through Shelby Farms and up Kirby Whitten. I totally forgot about Starry Nights traffic. For those of you who are not familiar with the Memphis area, a portion of this drive is two lane and normally, there isn't a lot of traffic, but there is a Christmas light display nearby and it creates logistical mayhem. Anyway, I was headed away from Shelby Farms on Kirby Whitten and was literally sitting in standstill traffic when I came upon a sidestreet and someone trying desperately to turn from said sidestreet, left onto Kirby Whitten. I kindly waited to allow this person to turn in front of me. The other driver had to wait for the traffic heading the other way to stop, since obviously, none of the jerks headed towards Starry Nights had the Christmas spirit enough to stop and let him pass through. The traffic ahead of me moved up approximately 20 feet and I stayed back to wait and let driver turn. Let me remind you, traffic was not moving 20 feet ahead of me and we were not even close to the stoplight. The &*^*^%%$^& people behind me flipped out and honked and yelled as if I could not see that the traffic had moved a little bit in front of me. The a-hole behind them even floored it and zoomed around me, cutting off the poor left hand turn guy. I was so mad I literally had to convince myself NOT to get out of the car and go tell the people behind me exactly what I thought about them. Note: once the left hand driver finally was able to turn in front of me, we waited another 15 minutes to get to the light, so there was literally NO difference in the traffic for me stopping to let this poor guy turn out of his neighborhood. Some people. Another note: after all of my efforts, I do not believe Left Turn Larry bothered to wave in gratitude. That pissed me off even more than the jackassery that was taking place in the car behind me. UGH.

In an unrelated note, I was able to return to my shredding today, and I am optimistic I will even be able to walk tomorrow. Tomorrow, however, my goal is to get out of bed and get going early, because part of the reason I post about this stuff is to show myself and anyone who cares that it IS possible to hold down a full time job, have a child, eat healthy, clean foods and work out regularly. Today, I did not want to get out of bed and I did not want to do my workout but eventually, I did. I didn't make it into work, however, until about 10:30. I realize most people do not have that luxury, so I am going to try and make it a point to get to work at a respectable time to further show myself and everyone else that this life is possible and sustainable.

Tonight, we had split pea soup. It looked disgusting but it tasted pretty good. Stay tuned for my further adventures in clean eating!

S.O.R.E.

As you all know, I stared Jillian Michaels' 30 day Shred on Wednesday morning. I woke up Thursday and was sore, but decided to push through and work out again. That may have been a mistake. Throughout the day on Thursday, I grew increasingly sore, to the point I was literally having to use my hands to lower myself onto chairs/toilets/anything you sit on. It was pretty pitiful. Jillian loves lunges and squats, hence the ridiculous soreness. Friday morning, I decided that walking was necessary because I needed to go to court and Christmas and grocery shopping, and also because it was just me and the little man this weekend as B was out of town. I am not sure that one would call what I was doing "walking." I seriously looked like I was trying to learn how to walk with prosthetic legs or something. My quads were so weak I feared my legs might just give out from under me. Pathetic. I was able to walk again today like a normal person, however, I cleaned the house, decorated, put up garland and Christmas lights outside, cooked dinner and started on dinner for tomorrow night, and am just now sitting down for the first time, so I have not done the workout since Thursday morning. Never fear, though. I plan on picking right back up tomorrow where I left off. I only hope that this week, my legs are at least a little bit stronger so that I can walk and use the restroom like normal.

I made some turkey burgers tonight with a crazy recipe from my Eat Clean book. The recipe included ground turkey, skim milk, high protein cereal flakes, egg whites and some other ingredients. When I formed the patties, I have to admit, I was pretty sure it was going to be a disaster. You know what, I was WRONG! They were delicious! I put the burger on a whole grain bun and added romaine lettuce and a teeny bit of guacamole. YUMMO.

Now, I am cooking split pea soup. I have had it once before and it was delicious. I keep going in to check on it, though, and it looks nothing like the picture in the cookbook or the kind I had before. I hope it doesn't turn out to be a huge waste. Maybe it will surprise me, like my turkey burgers. Stay tuned and I will let you know exactly how the soup turns out.

Would You Like Jello With Your Workout?

I purposely waited until many hours after my first Shred workout to post this blog so that I would be able to avoid calling Jillian Michaels an evil succubus. For a 20 minute workout, I definitely felt it! It really isn't Jillian, though. It is me. I am SO out of shape it is disgusting. I literally had to picture the 400 lb Biggest Loser competitors working out to this exact workout for 9 hours a day to force myself through the workout. My fitness is a sad state of affairs. Jillian said that people on their 5th day would find the workout much easier than the first day folks, which I hope is true since I spent much of the workout grabbing my socks, panting and heaving like a madman. I hope that is true. I can already tell that I am going to be sore tomorrow and my legs were jello-esque all morning after the workout. To make matters worse, I grabbed a pair of maternity workout pants this morning and they kept falling down around my ankles. While I am glad they don't still fit, it was super annoying having to pull them up every 3 to 5 jumping jacks. Savor that mental image. It was every bit as funny as you are picturing. One of my goals is to get fit and thin enough to have super cute workout clothes.

I am going to try to stick with the morning workout plan in addition to my clean eating plan. Every diet book/website/magazine article/television show out there says you have to stop making excuses about not having enough time in your day to work out and to make time for yourself. It worked fine this morning, although I did not waltz into work until about 10. I will have to plan better if there is ever a time I need to be at work at a decent hour. That is another thing about this whole health kick I am on, it literally FORCES you to get your shiz together and get organized. I have to plan out meals, get C's clothes, bottles, food, etc. ready the night before, have a rough idea of my clothes for the next day the night before, and the list goes on. It is a lot to take on. Consider this my fair warning to you should you choose to take on something like this.

Shred

Today I bought Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred so that I can work out in the morning and not forfeit any of my time with my little man since he is a good sleeper and doesn't usually wake up until 7 or later. (yay and knock on wood). I usually just sleep in until he wakes up. I will have to set an alarm and get up before he does. Now I have put it out here on the internet and I have to do it! My plan is to start tomorrow morning. Wish me luck. I hope to see results soon.

On that note, I would love to post some results from my clean eating plan, however, my scale is on the fritz. That is not a made up story like my dog ate my homework. I got on the scale Monday to see what my progress was after two full weeks and it said I was down 20 pounds from my original weight. Before you run out the door to buy the Eat Clean Diet book I've been using, I had the feeling that the 20 pound weight loss was a little too good to be true. I stepped back on the scale and it said that I was up 2 pounds from my original weight. So in a matter of seconds, the scale gave me two different weights that were 22 pounds apart. Riiiiight. So for now, I am using the ole tried and true "are my pants too tight?" method to gauge my weight loss since none of my clients find it necessary to pay their bills and I cannot get a new fancy scale right now. Maybe Santa will bring me a scale. Or a paycheck. Either would be much appreciated. For now, what I can tell you all is that my pants, while still tighter (and MUCH larger) than I would like, they are also less tight than they were before I started this. I can actually tell I have lost a little bit of weight. Maybe it is better that I can't weigh myself. This way, when I actually do get to a scale, I will have a massive weight loss number since I won't be weighing myself daily like I tend to do when I am dieting.

Biggest Loser Style

I don't know if it's my good influence, so much, or the fact that none of our suits fit anymore, but my office has decided to follow my lead and get healthy! The co-workers have dubbed our little experiment LFC, short for Lawyers' Fat Club. Each of the four of us is going to try a different method of weight loss. I am going to continue with clean eating and try Jillian Michael's 30 day Shred (the workout is still up for change as I have not yet purchased the 30 day Shred dvd). Amber may try the Biggest Loser diet. We're going to go to Barnes and Noble and look tomorrow to make a decision. Chris says his plan is to eat healthy foods and healthy portion sizes. I am not sure what Lee Ann's plan is, but if I had to bet, I'd say she is going to eat Lean Cuisines. She walks in the morning already, so she is ahead of the game exercise wise. I will keep you all posted on whose plan is the most effective. (Hope it's mine!)

Have any of you tried Biggest Loser style office challenges before? I hope it gives me us all a little motivation. We could all use a pick me up.

Waiting for the Food Network to Call

Yesterday, I spent the day with my little man. We decorated the house for Christmas. I am not finished because it takes approximately 1,000,043 hours to spread out the branches and make the tree look presentable. My hands and arms are cut all to hell but my tree looks good so I guess it's worth it. During the day, I decided to make some quinoa. I purchased it upon Tosca Reno's suggestion but had not yet mustered the courage to cook it. I cooked quinoa and some black beans and added some spicy flavor and had that with baked spicy chicken for both lunch and dinner. I am a culinary genius. It was delicious. I heart quinoa.

As the day went on, I realized that I needed some booze to fuel my Christmas spirit. I packed C-money up and we went to Hobby Lobby to get new ribbon for my Christmas tree and then headed over to Grape and Grain for a little vino. Yes. I took my 4 month old son into a liquor store. Don't judge me. It was a Christmas decorating emergency. I briefly considered wearing sunglasses into the store to shield myself from the shame.

Today, I need to get up and finish my decorating the house for Christmas and head over to Whole Foods for my grocery shopping for the week but what I really want to do is crawl back in bed. I am sleepy! I get to eat some new and exciting things this week (i.e. not sweet potatoes). I am most looking forward to brown rice, nonfat plain yogurt topped with granola and fresh berries, and whole grain muffins and wraps. I guess I need to plan out my meals for the week so I don't get carried away and waste a ton of money. I am pretty excited about the Paradise Island Bean Burgers we will be having one night this week. Yum!

Blogs of note...I was recently turned on to the Skinny Runner blog (thanks Morgan Beene) and although I am not a runner, at ALL, I am obsessed with it! Maybe I will be inspired to put on some jogging shoes and give running another chance. Check her out at skinnyrunner.com. What blogs do you love to read?

Thanksgiving

Well...I made it through Thanksgiving! I have to admit, I was a little nervous about the damage that Thanksgiving might do to the ole diet, but I weighed myself Thanksgiving morning and again this morning and...no weight gain! Not even one little ounce. I say that is a victory. I started out my Thanksgiving morning like every other (oatmeal and egg whites) and even had a midmorning snack of turkey and an apple. We ate lunch at Billy's mother's house and dinner at my aunt's house. I saved my splurge for dinner so at Billy's mom's house, I had a bit of turkey, a small spoonful of his mother's most delicious green bean casserole (it's my very favorite and it is not like your average green bean casserole with cream of mushroom soup. It's made of cream cheese and fatty yumminess).

At dinner, I ate horribly but I kept my portions small. I feel gluttonous telling you what all I consumed but I am going to put it out there because that is what this blog is about. I had stuffing, cheesy hashbrown casserole, 2 deviled eggs (2! dammit Holly!), corn casserole and mac and cheese. I also had a tiny bit of dessert but it really was just a bite of two of my faves so it wasn't too bad. The ridiculous carb and cheese overload definitely made me feel lethargic and yuck, but it tasted delicious and it was Thanksgiving, so I make no apologies for the splurge. I got right back on the diet bandwagon this morning and had oatmeal and egg whites and I even packed my chicken, spinach and sweet potato and my snacks as we went up to Greenfield, Tennessee to decorate my grandfather's house for Christmas.

I love my grandfather's house but I think it looks especially beautiful at Christmas. He has an ancient Christmas tree that we have to put in each branch to assemble it, but it's enormous (like 12 feet tall) so we continue to use that same one year after year. It is obviously not pre-lit, as it is from the 60's, and we usually just drape lights around it and call it a day and it looks fine. This year, I decided to go all out and wrap the lights in and out of each branch. It looked amazing. Do you have any idea how many lights that takes? About 8,000,000. That's how many. It also took about 260 hours. It looks great, though. I will post pictures later. Maybe.

Well, I hope all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! The New Year will be here before you know it, so maybe some of you will be inspired and try a little clean eating, too! I am excited that I made it through the first two weeks (oatmeal and sweet potato hell) and I have to tell you, I don't hate oatmeal anymore. I have gotten used to it and actually sort of like it now. Now I can eat other clean foods like yogurt with granola and fresh fruit, nut butters, peas and beans, brown rice, Ezekial breads and wraps and whole grain pasta. YUMMO.

Conquering Mexico!

Billy wanted to go to a Mexican restaurant tonight so I agreed, since he did not sign up for this crazy diet with me and I am sure that he is DONE eating baked sweet potatoes. Plus, I have to learn how to eat out eventually, right? I stayed strong, despite having to watch Billy eat a cheesy delicious burrito. I did not eat chips or cheese dip, which is basically the only reason to eat at a Mexican restaurant. I had grilled chicken fajitas with bell peppers and onions and a side of guacamole salad. I put a bit of salsa on some of the fajita meat as well and it was delicious. Who needs cheese dip anyway?

Public Service Announcement

This is not a dietary post. It is a public service announcement. I think that we need to have a little lesson on the use of the apostrophe. (' for those of you who do not know what an apostrophe is). The apostrophe is quite possibly the most over used and abused punctuation mark in the universe. The apostrophe SHOULD be used for the following purposes:

1. To show ownership or possession of something.

Examples: Carter's blanket.

The Holt's table.

The team's trophy.

Three girls' purses.

Note: Apostrophes are not necessary when using words that naturally imply possession. For example, hers, not her's.

2. In contractions such as these:

Are not = Aren't

Is not = Isn't

She is = She's

APOSTROPHES ARE NOT NEEDED WHEN AN 'S' IS ADDED TO A WORD TO MAKE THE WORD PLURAL!!!

Example:

Incorrect: The Holt's are coming to dinner.

Correct: The Holts are coming to dinner.

or a trickier one...

Incorrect: The Harris' are coming to dinner.

Correct: The Harrises are coming to dinner.

Also Correct: Belle is the Harrises' dog.

One more grammar tip for the day: alot is not a word. The correct way to say you have a lot of something is with two words...a and lot.

To Motivate the Non-Believers

I waited the entire week to post any stats, so here goes. Since I have started the clean eating I have lost (drumroll please) 6 pounds! Yay! I know that this is just because I have started something new and shocked my body with my nutritional intake, but still, it's exciting and motivating, no?

I think that this is also starting to help me in other areas of my life, as well. Yes, I am aware that I have only been doing it for a week, but I swear, I was less preoccupied with hatred for my job and my clients, etc. last week and I was so excited about preparing my meals for the week ahead of time, that I was in a surprisingly good mood on the way to my mediation today. This case has been going on for years. YEARS, people! Guess what? They SETTLED!!! I am convinced it is because of the residual effect of my obsession with my new diet. I have been so preoccupied with it that I have seriously worried so much less about my evil work life!

I won't continue to post my meals this week, as they are the same (oatmeal, egg whites, chicken, broccoli and sweet potatoes) pretty much every day until the end of this week. I did, however try something a little new with my sweet potatoes, because I could not stomach the thought of another baked sweet potato. I baked a few yesterday and today, I peeled the skin off, chopped one up, added some liquid smoke flavor and chipotle spice and then mixed them with a mixer like you would mashed potatoes. It was good! I just needed a little variety and it hit the spot. I don't like my sweet potatoes sweet, anyway, so smoky and spicy was the way to go for me.

I got a few suggestions on workout dvds so thanks to everyone for the input! I will be sure to keep everyone posted on my progress once I start my workout plan, too!

Well, I made it through the weekend! I am pretty proud of that. The weekend is much tougher than the weekday, because there is no routine. I spent the morning cooking for the week and let me tell you, it gave me such a feeling of accomplishment! I have a really early mediation tomorrow morning (well, it's not THAT early, but it is WAY out in Collierville and I have to be there on time, unlike my regular workday) and I already have my lunch and snacks packed for tomorrow and dinner cooked for tomorrow night! I am hopeful we will settle this case before my midmorning snack :) I highly doubt that will happen but I am going to think positive thoughts. I may have a bit of a struggle keeping to my plan tomorrow with this mediation but I have packed for the day and all I can do is be prepared and remember what I have learned.

So as some of you may have noticed, I have yet to mention exercise in this blog. I am sure you are thinking..."if she is trying to lose weight and get healthy, why doesn't she start working out?" I am not going to make any excuses for myself but I am going to say this: this diet is hardcore at first and requires a great deal of preparation, planning and cooking. I knew that if I was going to stick to it, I needed to establish my eating habits before making any other monumental changes. I felt that if I dove into too many things all at once, I would quickly burn out and I really did not want that to happen. That said, I am getting comfortable with the diet and feel that after a week or two more of the eat clean experiment, I will be ready to add some exercise to my routine.

I was once a committed gym member. In fact, during my first and second year of law school, I worked out every morning before class. Then again after graduation and once I had found a job, I worked out every morning before work. This was a huge commitment on my part as I had to get to the gym at 5 in the morning. My bff Laura even came with me. She was a good sport. Looking back, I do not understand why I did not alter my eating habits at that time. I literally got up at 4:45 every morning and dragged my fat ass to the gym and basically didn't lose any weight because I still ate like crap. When I got pregnant, I fell off of the workout wagon again. I could kick myself for stopping, because while I was not losing any weight, I was getting in much better shape and was much stronger. Oh well. Hindsight is 20/20.

Now, I have a 4 month old. I am not using him as an excuse not to work out, but it does complicate things. I cannot go in the morning because my husband leaves for work too early and there would be no one to watch the baby. After work, I have to rush to the babysitter's house to get Carter and then rush home to cook dinner. I think I need to start with something that I can do at my house in the morning or evenings. Does anyone have a suggestion? I have heard P90X and Insanity work wonders, but I am a little intimidated. What do you think?

7 days = 1/3 way to a habit

I think it's the theory (or maybe it's a proven fact) that it takes 21 days to make something a habit. It is possible I made that up or messed it up completely, but I'm going to go with it. I have been at this clean eating experiment for 7 days, so, theoretically, eating healthy will be a habit for me in 14 more days. I hope so!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Saturday. I spent mine with my favorite little man. I didn't get much accomplished, though. I tried to get our stockings monogrammed today, but the stupid place closed at 2:00. What kind of business closes at 2 on a Saturday? The only other monogramming place I could think of is in the front of Walmart on Hwy 64 and I would rather take a bullet than go to Walmart on a Saturday, especially this close to the holidays. It would be a veritable madhouse. After the failed monogramming incident, Carter and I headed over to Target, which was a zoo. I wanted to get a little Christmas shopping done, but one look at the toy section and I decided that my shopping would have to wait...preferably until a weeknight when the store is not so crowded and I don't have Carter with me. I got some spoons and bowls for Carter to use for cereal and got out of there as fast as I could. Then we went to the clubhouse for some football. It was fun, but it is definitely different for me there now than it was last football season!

As you can tell from my post, I made it through today with my plan. I mixed it up with scrambled egg whites with spinach and turkey for dinner. I didn't have any cooked chicken or sweet potatoes and I really didn't want that anyway. The eggs hit the spot.

One week down, one week to go (of the strict stuff).

Things Got a Little Dicey

Well today, things got a little dicey with the new plan. I didn't eat anything that wasn't on the plan, but I also didn't stick to my meal schedule. I started off okay, in fact, I ate my oatmeal (with scrambled egg whites of course) and it looked like things were going to go as normal. I was even super proud of myself because I got up at 6 to run to Kroger and get some eggs as I had used the last of them yesterday. Commitment points for sure. I had to take Carter to his 4 month checkup this morning and that is where I got off track. I totally missed my midmorning snack altogether. Then, I came home for lunch before heading to court in the afternoon. I had cooked a few chicken breasts the night before and was afraid they would not be tasty because they looked to have a little bit of frostbite on them and then I thawed them in the microwave and I always think that is a bad idea. I was right. I started with baked chicken on top of romaine lettuce and 1/2 baked sweet potato. The chicken was totally inedible and I was in a time crunch. In a stroke of genius, I decided that I would use egg whites as my protein in a pinch, so I cooked up some egg whites. They tasted a little funny. A very familiar taste....hmmm....yes that was it, I clearly didn't get all of the dish soap out of the pan before I cooked my eggs. Gross. By that time, I was out of time, so I headed out the door for court with my apple in hand. My court appearance was really quick and I had already paid the babysitter, so I headed to Whole Foods to get my groceries for next week. By the time I got home, I wanted a little nap (a certain little boy woke me up in the middle of the night because he had a tummy ache). I slept right through my mid afternoon snack. For dinner, Billy wanted to go out to eat. I was reluctant, but like a good little dieting wife, I looked up the restaurant choices that Billy gave me and picked Outback because I was able to stick to my diet there. I even came home with a meal for tomorrow! I had Grilled Chicken on the Barbie with no bbq sauce and "served lightly." I had steamed vegetables and baked sweet potato, plain. I started off by cutting the chicken portion and the baked sweet potato in half and requesting a to go box so neither Billy nor myself would eat it. It was delicious! I swear, it is the exact same thing that I make for myself and it tastes 100 times better. The texture of the chicken was better (read: not chainsaw chicken...I am terrified of undercooked poultry). Even the baked sweet potato was better and it didn't have anything on it! That is how celebs stick to these diets...they have professionals hired to cook for them. I need to ask for cooking classes for Christmas!

That's a good idea, actually. I wonder where I could take a healthy cooking class? Anyone know of any in the Memphis area?

I will keep you posted on how the weekend goes. I was nervous, but now that I have made a grocery run and my fridge is stocked with healthy options, I am ready! I am so proud of my fridge when I open the doors. I should post a picture. It is literally teeming with yummy organic produce. Just a week ago, I only had condiments and beer in the fridge. I feel like a bona fide grown up!

a l m o s t there

I feel like if I make it to Friday with my new experiment, I have made it. I think it's because at work, we have a tendency to talk each other into going to lunch pretty much every day, just to get away from the insanity of our clients. I knew that if I made it through one week at work, I would show myself and my coworkers that I am serious and I really want to stick this out. So, yay! 4 days down! I know my coworkers waistlines and wallets will thank me if we all stick to eating at the office every day.

For those of you who have been on the edge of your seats waiting for my oatmeal update, today, I tried steel cut oats topped with fresh blueberries and two sliced strawberries. I will say this, I think that if the berries were in season, it would've been pretty good. The berries were a little sour, I think, because berry season is in the summer. Sour berries aside, the oatmeal was tolerable today. I was able to tolerate several bites of oatmeal without wanting to gag. Progress.

Also today, we ate dinner with my in-laws. We usually eat with them every Wednesday but this week, we moved it. Anyway, I took my dinner (and made Billy warn them ahead of time so that they would not think I was an a-hole for bringing my own dinner), and they had vegetable soup. I have only been asking for vegetable soup since it started to get cold and right now, I cannot eat it (especially not the way they cooked it :(

Okay well it's time to put the little one to bed so for those who are interested, here is what I ate today (sidenote: once I am through the strict period of this experiment, I will probably only notify my readers of truly delicious--or truly disgusting dishes)

Breakfast

Steel cut oats with fresh blueberries and strawberries

Scrambled egg whites with one yolk

Mid Morning Snack

1/2 apple

(I was in court so I couldn't very well whip out a chicken breast to nosh on)

Lunch

Leftover baked chicken with chipotle seasoning

steamed broccoli

1/2 baked sweet potato

Afternoon snack

1/2 apple

sliced baked chicken breast with some delicious jalapeno hot sauce

Dinner

Spinach salad topped with baked chicken, avocado and tomato, and balsamic vinegar

1/2 baked sweet potato

I think I can I think I can

Well, today is day three of my experiment. I stuck to it, but let me tell you, this first "strict" phase is no joke! You're just so limited in what you can eat. I am especially limited because I don't like fish. I know, I know...eating fish is good for you. I am going to try and force myself to like fish but not right now. Right now, my focus is on making myself like oatmeal. To that end, I had steel cut oats this morning and they have a much more palatable texture than the rolled oats. They still, however, do not taste good to me. I think they will be much better when I add some flavorful things. Today, upon a friend's suggestion, I went by Fresh Market and got some blueberries, raspberries and strawberries with hopes that I will actually start to like oatmeal. I tried to think while eating my oats today (just like a cheesy diet book) that I was eating to fuel my body and not just for my own gluttonous pleasure. I was able to choke down a few bites. I'll let you know tomorrow if the fruit helps. I also got some good tips from readers about what to add once I am no longer in the strict phase.

This is not intended to be a project to force myself to like oatmeal, so I will move on. Although I feel like I have been doing this forever in a day, it has only been three days, so there are no results to report just yet. I can tell you this: I read in the book that your body goes through a detoxification of sorts when you start this plan and I believe it. I had a horrible headache yesterday and I truly feel like it is grueling, at times. I know it will be worth it so I am ever hopeful that I will keep it up! I know it will be much easier and more pleasurable after next week, when I can add some more food choices to my repertoire. I also bought a cookbook and some of the recipes truly look delicious! I can't wait to try those and report to you all how wonderful and delicious and easy this plan is instead of constantly complaining about oatmeal. In addition to the withdrawal symptoms, I also noticed today that I had a lack of appetite. I could not eat the protein with my morning or afternoon snack and I was not really hungry at lunch. I am not sure if that is part of the plan, if my portion sizes were too big (I don't think that is the case) or if I was just sick of chicken and sweet potatoes. Whatever the case, I struggled to eat the suggested diet today. Here is what I actually consumed:

Breakfast

Steel cut oats with cinnamon and 1 tsp vanilla extract

Scrambled egg whites with one yolk

Mid Morning snack

1/2 apple

Lunch

Spinach salad topped with baked chicken, avocado, tomato and balsamic vinagrette

1/2 baked sweet potato

Afternoon snack

1/2 apple

Dinner

Baked chicken with chipotle spice

Steamed broccoli florets

1/2 baked sweet potato (although I only ate a few bites)

After dinner

1 small spoonful of natural peanut butter

Conspiracy Theory

Well, it's my second day on my clean eating expedition. Today was also the second day that I tried to force myself to like oatmeal. Actually, I have tried on multiple occasions and I still find it the most repulsive substance on earth. Tomorrow, I think I will try steel cut oats instead of rolled oats. I have tried steel cut oats before, but they can't be worse than the oats I had this morning.

I do not plan on continuing to torture myself with the oatmeal, in case you were wondering. I am just trying to stick to the strict phase as closely as possible for the next two weeks. I did not realize at all that next Thursday was Thanksgiving. Excuse me, November, just where do you think you are going? I guess I will have no choice but to cheat a little on Thanksgiving but I promise myself that I will not eat ridiculous portion sizes like I always do. Also, I think I will eat my regular breakfast (egg whites and oats) and even possibly my mid morning snack (protein and complex carb). We do lunch at Billy's mother's house and then dinner at my aunt's house. I always save up to eat dinner since my mom cooks what her kids like the best. I think I will try to either just eat a teeny bit of some type of protein (turkey or something even though I don't really like Thanksgiving turkey. I know...I am weird) and maybe some green beans or something. That way, I will only be cheating for the one meal. I'll let you know how that turns out for me.

Today I realized something very scary...grocery stores are set up to make you fail at all diets and to make you FAT! I went to Kroger on the way home to pick up some rice cereal for Carter (he's getting so big!) and as I walked through my neighborhood Kroger, I was astonished at the things I saw. It's not like I've never been to the grocery store before, or even this one, but for some reason, now that I have started this new plan and been to the local health food store, I was totally shocked at what Kroger had to offer! For example, I headed straight to the produce section just to see what they had to offer since I am sure I won't ALWAYS be able to go to Whole Foods when I need some groceries. The produce section was okay, but not great. Then you have to travel through the baked goods section where the grocer tries to entice the diligent dieter with all sorts of yummy baked confections, not to mention the casseroles and unhealthy whatnot they serve at the deli counter! I went on around the store and as I made my way towards the baby aisle, I noticed that every single end display was for cupcakes, poptarts, chips and other assorted junk food. Not one single end display had anything of any nutritional value. In fact, the "healthy food sections" in the local grocery stores are hidden in and amongst the junk food rubble. Then, every single checkout line is fully stocked with an array of candies. No wonder we're all a bunch of fatties. (By we, I mean Americans...specifically Memphians). I was really scared from my visit today that when I do need to shop for my groceries, perhaps I should try and frequent the health food store every time. I am not sure if anyone has the willpower to say no to all that unhealthy goodness every single time she frequents the grocery!

Scary grocery trip aside, I stuck to the new regimen again today...two days down, a lifetime to go! If you're interested, what I ate today was:

Breakfast

Scrambled egg whites with one yolk

Oatmeal with cinnamon and vanilla extract

Mid Morning Snack

1/2 apple

sliced oven roasted turkey

Lunch

Romaine Lettuce salad with baked chicken and lemon juice

1/2 baked sweet potato

Afternoon snack

1/2 apple

sliced oven roasted turkey

Dinner

Baked chicken with chipotle pepper spice on top of a bed of spinach leaves, topped with avocado and tomato salad with lemon juice. I also put a teeny bit of balsamic vinegar on the salad (it was delicious!)

1/2 baked sweet potato

Day One

A success! I am pretty impressed with myself because we had to go to lunch as an office for a birthday party for our former partner who moved to Dallas. Basically, to be a clean eater, you are supposed to eat 5-6 small meals a day. For breakfast, I had oats (oatmeal) and scrambled egg whites. For my mid-morning snack, I had 1/2 of a delicious apple and a few slices of oven roasted turkey (that I roasted this morning before work--turkey breasts). For lunch (out to eat) I had an asian dish that had chicken, broccoli, and snap peas with brown rice. It was delicious! I wish I could hire a chef to help me on my journey! For my afternoon snack, I ate the rest of the apple. You're supposed to have a lean protein as well, but I am having some sinus drainage issues and I just didn't want it. For dinner, we had baked chicken, steamed broccoli, and 1/2 of a baked sweet potato. Dinner was good as well. Throughout the day, I have been drinking as much water as I could. You're supposed to drink a ridiculous amount of water, but as I mentioned earlier, I am having some sinus issues and it has been a chore for me to choke down the required amount of water. I'm still sipping, though.

While I am super proud of myself for making it through the day with the temptations of birthday muffins in the morning and yummy restaurant food at lunch, let me be completely honest. This morning, even though I was in no hurry to be at work, I was TOTALLY overwhelmed trying to get everything ready for the day. I think in order for this to really work and for me to stick to it, I am going to have to prepare for the day the night before. I also plan to cook what I can for the week on Sunday.

Well, so far, so good. I know it's only been one day, but I can already tell that this is going to be a huge commitment on my part. The person who wrote the book that I read about this diet claims that it will make me feel wonderful, fire up my metabolism and help me get and stay lean and healthy forever. I hope she is right! I guess now that I have put it out there for my 6 readers, I will have a little bit more motivation to stick to it! I will let you know how it makes me feel after I've been on the plan for a few days!

Eat Clean Experiment

Things at work are crazy (not in a good way) and I am now doing what I always do when some part of my life is making me unhappy: I am diving head first into something that I can preoccupy myself with. This time, however, I am doing something that is GOOD for me. I will use my blog to update my progress.

Basically, I have decided to start "eating clean." It's not really a diet, so much as it is a change in my eating lifestyle. I mean, it's not a diet in that there is no calorie counting, etc. It is a diet to me, though, as it is so dramatically different than the crap I have been putting in my body for the past 29 years (especially the past 5).

The basic premise of "eating clean" is that you eat foods that are nutritious and whole and good, such as fresh, organic produce and lean meats and avoid all over processed foods, especially white flower and sugar.

As with all diets, the first two weeks are super strict, meant to help break addictions to sugars and other bad things. I wanted to dive into this project whole heartedly, so I went straight to Whole Foods to stock my fridge and pantry.

First, let me say this: I always feel like people at places like Whole Foods are staring at me and thinking that I do not belong there. I do not know why I have this self consciousness, but I faced my fear and went to WF (on a weekend, no less!) and got lots of organic and yummy goodies and (shockingly) did not spend all that much more than I would have for a normal trip to the grocery.

I will keep you all posted on my progress. Wish me luck!

Who IS this person?

For the last 12 months or so, I have been a recluse of sorts, and now, my only excitement comes from family oriented things, and I couldn't be happier about it. Let me give you an example. Next weekend, my sister and I are going on a road trip to Knoxville to see the Vols play. We're staying in the hotel room with my parents and we're taking Carter with us. I have a feeling that this tailgate will be different from my tailgates past and I am super pumped about it! Another example, I spent the evening (Saturday night, mind you) purchasing gifts for my friends' kids' birthdays and watching football and Sex and the City reruns with Carter and I could not have picked a better evening for myself (except, maybe, if Billy were here and we were watching football or a movie together, but he is out with a friend in town from Florida). I was text messaging with another of my mommy friends whilst shopping for the kids' birthday gifts. We have been friends since high school, and we lived together for a year in college, so to say that we have seen some fun times together would be an understatement. We've been to a million football games, traveled the tropics on spring breaks and spent countless nights partying together. Tonight, however, we were discussing how fun the next child's birthday party was going to be because there will be a lot of our friends there. That's right. We are looking forward to a three year old's birthday party. I asked her if she thought our 20 year old selves would even believe it if they saw our nearly 30 year old selves. I am pretty sure I would not believe it. Ha!

A lady I work with always says, "the name of the game is change." I am starting to believe that is true. I wonder what we will be like when we're 40? I wonder if our kids will EVER believe that we were once cool? I doubt it. I barely believe it myself, now.

Project Gold-be-gone

We are currently up to our ears in home renovations at our new house. I am not sure if I have blogged about it in its entirety so I will give a quick recap. Basically, we had our master bathroom tiled. (It was carpet, which is gross). When they pulled the facing off of the bottom of our shower, we found out that our shower pan was cracked and we had mold and mildew underneath it. That explained the funk-ish smell that we had previously attributed to sulphur in the water. My apologies to Bartlett water for questioning its cleanliness.

Anyway, this disgusting discovery led to our decision, or, rather, forced our hand into taking out our somewhat ghetto shower and replacing it. We are taking out the porcelain facade shower (think re-bath) and replacing it with tile. In the process, we are trading out our super brassy gold shower faucet and nozzle. They are atrocious. Although this was an expense that we were not prepared for and did not expect, I am at least glad that we are getting new and nice shower products. We totally forgot, however, that we also needed to replace the handles and spout on the tub. The only one in the finish we like is SO SUPER expensive that we will have to wait on that one. Boo :( Bathroom faucets and the like are ridiculously expensive. It's offensive, really.

In further renovation news, I am also replacing lights throughout the house, one by one. As we speak, my husband and sweet dad are replacing the hanging light in the entryway and after that, they are headed into the dining room to replace that one as well. I am pumped! To say that I hate the light fixtures that came with this house is an understatement. All of this renovation is also really helping me to make this house my own.

I will post pictures soon!

Monday: 1, Holly: 0

Everyone hates Mondays. It's universal. Lately, however, my Mondays have seemed worse than usual. I don't know what it is, and I am sure my total dread of Mondays that begins the Saturday night before plays a part, but I have been having some truly dread-worthy Mondays recently.

Let's look at today, for example. Carter woke up a little early, so he wanted to eat again before I had to leave the house. That threw my schedule a little off, so I was in a huge rush to drop him off at the babysitter and fly to work to make it in time for my morning consult. I got in the car, only to remember I had ZERO gas. I could not have been more annoyed. I always need gas on Monday mornings. It is like some sort of cosmic curse. I practically threw Carter at the babysitter and zoomed to the nearest gas station as there was no way I could've made it all the way to work without filling up.

Of course, I stopped at the pump that does not allow you to pump and leave, meaning, I had to stand there and hold it. Meanwhile, my phone was bleeping away in the car and I could not get to it. I got back in the car and had about 8 minutes to make the 20 minute drive to work. Of course, I got stuck behind the slowest driver in the universe trying to make my way around Shelby Farms. Then, I hit every light on Germantown Parkway. Once I got to work, there were no parking spaces anywhere near my office, so I sprinted, files in hand, worried that my poor potential client would be waiting on me. She wasn't. She was a no show. People are so @#$#$%$ rude! I risked life and limb to make it to my consult on time and she didn't show up! Note to readers: it is incredibly inconsiderate to make an appointment with a lawyer and not show up for it.

The day has calmed down a little and I am halfway through yet another Monday I did not think I could bear to face. For now, I will make the same promise I make (and break) each week: next Monday, I will have a better attitude.

Heartbreak

Owwwweeee my heart is still hurting! As I have made abundantly clear in my previous blog posts, I am an avid Tennessee supporter and my beloved Vols suffered a heartbreaking loss yesterday to LSU. This was no ordinary loss, though. The circumstances surrounding this game created the perfect storm of heartbreaking loss. First of all, LSU was ranked #10 in the country when we headed down to Baton Rouge to take on the Tigers. (I say "we," but I was only there in spirit. I watched from the privacy of my own home and that turned out to be for the best). Second, my Vols are having a really tough year. We are on our third coach in as many years, and fresh off of the sting of betrayal from the coach who must not be named. Sweet Derek Dooley (aka Superman to my sister and me) has his work cut out for him. He has a team full of players who were recruited by other coaches, a young offensive line, and an inexperienced quarterback. To say it is a rebuilding year would be an understatement. The Vols struggled to beat the University of Alabama at Birmingham the week before, so they were expected to take a true beating in the Bayou. As if the aforementioned circumstances did not make for enough of an uphill battle for the Big Orange, our star kicker, Daniel Lincoln, suffered some sort of leg injury, so our poor little true freshman backup kicker was thrown in the game with virtually no notice!

On the Tiger's very first play, they ran nearly the length of the field for a touchdown. Things did not look good. Surprisingly, though, and largely due to the sloppy play of the LSU offense, the Vols hung in there and even led for almost all of the game. As the clock wound down, UT was up by 4 and had the ball. The Vols were faced with a fourth down situation, and with the star kicker out and the freshman backup with one miss under his belt already for the day, Coach Dooley chose to go for it to try and convert to first down. We didn't. LSU had a little more than 2 minutes to drive down the field and score a touchdown. Time and again, they moved the ball down the field. Finally, the Tigers had one last chance: a fourth down and goal, had to score or the game was over play. THE VOLS HELD THEM! WE WON! WE BEAT LSU! Wait...what? WTF? Is that a flag? Surely it is on LSU. Their last play looked like a hot mess. What? No way. No EFFING WAY! The Vols had 13 players on the field and the Tigers get another chance at a score and a win.

I think it is pretty obvious that they scored on the last play of the game...hence the title of my blog. Dang it.

Despite the loss, the losing record, and the overall frustration of the season thus far, I am still REALLY proud of my Vols and could not have been more proud at the persistence they displayed on Saturday. I really like Derek Dooley and am impressed with his class and honesty. He seems like he really respects the traditions of Tennessee and SEC football and that is very important (and something that was lacking in our last coach). Plus, he is kind of dreamy in a serious, driven, ambitious sort of way :)

Sidenote: I saw some backlash against Dooley on facebook this past weekend and I think those people should be punched in the face. Let's give the guy a flippin chance before we go on yet another frantic search for a coach before football season begins! Geez he is not a miracle worker, you fairweather a-holes!

Go Vols!

(Sorry for all of my non-football-loving followers. I will keep my sports blogs to a minimum, I promise).

Hello Fall

I heard on the Today show that today was the first day of fall. Although our fourth consecutive day of ninety plus degree, record breaking temperatures makes this tidbit of knowledge less believable, I have been told that next week, fall temperatures are headed to Memphis. Finally.

I love fall. I think I say this of every season when each one starts. I love the beginning of every season, and by the end, I am ready for the next one. Fall is particularly wonderful, though, as it signals the end of scorching temperatures and the beginning of football season.

As anyone who knows me personally knows, I support the University of Tennessee (in all sports, especially football), and this is a "rebuilding" year for my beloved Vols. (That is subject for another blog...this is a positive blog about the start of a new season). A good football team is not the only reason to celebrate, though. I love UT for a variety of reasons, one of which being its location. I LOVE Knoxville. I love love love the drive from Memphis to Knoxville once the leaves have changed. Interstate 40 literally becomes a corridor of the most gorgeous fall colors imaginable. As you get closer to Knoxville, the landscape changes from the flat, colorless scene of West Tennessee to the mountainous, gorgeous scene of East Tennessee. Seriously, the rich reds, oranges, yellows and greens that dot the mountainsides are breathtaking. Every time I drive to Knoxville in the autumn, I fall a little more in love with the mountains.

As if the picturesque mountains were not enough to make you fall in love, once you get to Knoxville on a game day, the sea of orange is pretty much the most beautiful sight ever. There is a hum of excitement on game days and whether the Vols are winning or losing, Neyland stadium is nearly always packed with supporters in orange. I know that I am biased, but I think it is beautiful.

Dream Girl

I have been thinking a lot lately about what job I might actually LOVE doing. I've been trying to find my "dream job," if you will. It has been said (by whom, I do n0t know--Google it yourself) that if you love your job, you never work a day in your life. I do not have this privilege right now. I think having a baby really made me reconsider what is important to me. Life is short and I would like to be able to say, one day, that I LOVE my job.

With that being said, I don't really know what my dream job is. I mean, I know my ultimate dream job would be to write wildly successful novels, however, I have so much self doubt that I do not know if I will truly ever be able to do something like that. Sometimes, though, I think of the pieces of garbage that I have read and it gives me some confidence that I, too, can write a book that people might actually purchase. We'll see if this dream comes to fruition.

In the meantime, my coworkers and I have been discussing other options. So far, we have discussed opening a Chick-fil-a, but the requirements for obtaining one of these franchises ruled it out for us. We have also discussed opening a day care, but that may be more of a headache than it's worth with all of the licensing and liability issues and whatnot. I looked at some of the statutory requirements and it put me off of the daycare idea, at least for today.

What are some of your dream jobs? I would like to know what other people daydream about.

Sloth--Deadly Sin or Awesome Friday? Let's Discuss.

Today, I had my first work day at home with Carter. For those of you who don't know, I worked out a deal with my boss so that I can work from home on Fridays unless I have court or something that requires my presence. I'm pretty excited about it.

Today, we woke up (for good) at about 8:00, which ruled. I could definitely sleep until 8 every day and be a lot more pleasant. At 8:00 p.m., I decided it was time to shower and give the baby a bath. Yes. I was still in my pajamas. In my defense, I had changed my shirt earlier in the day because the first one was covered in spit up, but the bottom line is, I have been in some form of pajamas all day long. I only showered because I was afraid Billy would come home and call child protective services or something.

Although my clothes and lack of showering might suggest otherwise, I actually had a really productive day. I actually did work a little and made some progress with a case that's been stalling for way too long. I also tidied up the house, which was no small feat. It's amazing how much crap piles up around the house when you have a baby living there. I washed bottles, did Carter's laundry, put his clothes away, cleaned the bathroom and kitchen, and started on the living room. Who knew I could be so productive while working from home? Too bad I don't have some sort of kick ass job where I could work from home all of the time. Any suggestions for a job like that (one that actually provides income)? I am still hopeful that one day, I will have a wonderful story to tell and I will become a successful novelist. That would rule.

Have a good weekend and Go Vols!

Confessions of a Lazy Blogger

So it's been a few weeks since I last blogged and I felt obligated to update even though I don't think I have any readers. I was trying to think about what I should write about and the choice was pretty obvious as my mind is completely preoccupied with one thing and one thing only: Carter. I will be the first to admit, I am pretty much obsessed with him. Not to sound like a total cliche but I had no idea how much my life would change when I brought this baby home. I mean, I knew that there would be less sleep and more diapers and I would have to care for someone else every single day, so that part, I was prepared for, but I was not prepared with how much I would change.

I have long believed myself to be an insensitive, non maternal asshole, basically. Turns out, I have some maternal instinct after all. Perhaps even more surprising, I love being a mother. I truly questioned whether or not I had the chops to be a satisfactory mom, and I worried that I was too selfish to enjoy the wonderful benefits that other mothers enjoyed. My reaction to this little man totally put to rest any fears I had that I might not completely love motherhood. I never thought I would want my baby to sleep in my room, but he is still in his bassinet and I don't want to put him in his own room AT ALL! Also, I have never once even thought that I might want to stay at home with children. In fact, I was so sure that I would want to come back to work that I scheduled a court hearing just 8 weeks after I had him. It turns out, I'd like nothing better than to be able to stay at home and take care of my little man. It nearly killed me to drop him off at the babysitter's house last week. Luckily, I spoke to my boss and will be working from home on Fridays so that I can spend some time with my little boy. I continue to surprise myself every day and I cannot wait to see what other surprises this little boy has in store for me.

I posted few recent pics of my sweet Carter man.

Although I adore being a mom, I do not adore the unsolicited advice that new mothers receive. (See earlier post regarding unsolicited advice for pregnant women). I swear, it's worse once you have a baby. I did not think it was possible for people to be more annoying than they were when I was pregnant and they were showering me with their pearls of wisdom but I was sorely mistaken. For example, I have received several eye rolls and a few "Oh Holly" comments when mentioning that Carter is still sleeping in a bassinet in my room. I do not give a flying expletive what everyone else thinks is right, I will put him in his room when I am good and ready. Also, you would not believe how many people roll their eyes and think it is "hogwash" that new moms have their newborns sleep on their backs. Older mothers insist that we all slept on our stomachs and we are all fine. I want to tell these old bags that there has been a LOT of research on what the safest sleeping position for babies is and it is, in fact, on their backs. I am not saying that mothers whose kids sleep on their stomachs are in any way bad moms, I am just saying that my child likes to sleep on his back, and that is the recommended sleeping position for babies, especially ones that cannot roll over yet, so for now he will sleep on his back. I also want to tell them that back in the day, people didn't put their kids in car seats, but that doesn't mean it's safe to toss the kid in the backseat and roll out. People also used to drink and smoke when they were pregnant and we now know that is ridiculous. All of these things have changed because of what we now know and I don't need some random woman telling me what I should do with my baby. Okay, enough ranting. I am going to go back to enjoying my sweet baby :)

I've Been Busy!

Not that anyone really missed it, but I haven't updated my blog in months. Inspired by a few friends' recent updates, I am back. For those of you that don't know, we welcomed our sweet baby boy, Carter Barton, into the family on July 12, 2010 at 9:10 p.m. He is perfect and wonderful and the absolute love of our lives.

It is so cliche, but it is true what everyone says--you cannot imagine how much you can love someone until you have a child. He is such a blessing.

I have had lots of practice over the last few years with Carter's older cousins, Gracie and Emerson. Thank goodness Haley (my sister) went first with the kids so I could learn how to do important things like change diapers and feed and burp small babies. Even with the wonderful practice and excellent tutors, there are many times when I still feel like I have no idea what I'm doing. I guess you just have to learn as you go. There are other times, though, that I feel like I know exactly what to do to calm him down or make him feel better and no one else can. I guess that is the maternal instinct that I was certain I did not have. Thank goodness it has showed itself. I was worried for poor Carter that I was going to be completely clueless.

We're In!

This past weekend, Billy and I officially moved into our new house. There is still a lot of work to do, but we have a place to lay our heads, and, more importantly, a place to lay our sweet baby when he gets here. I cannot begin to tell you the amount of stress I've been feeling lately with all this moving craziness. To make matters a bit worse, it could not have been any hotter this past weekend. Moving in the summer whilst 9 months pregnant was definitely not my best laid plan. Oh well. I am so glad to have a little bit of stability. Between the clutter of moving and the clutter of trying to shut down my law practice for my maternity leave, my life was in utter chaos. Anyone who knows me knows that I am not the "fly by the seat of your pants" kind of girl. I need order and organization and I felt like I had no refuge from the chaos around me. I was stressed at work and at home. I am so relieved to have the calm I've been craving at home at least.

We definitely have our work cut out for us. My sweet dad replaced every single cabinet handle in the house (see below) and painted our massive pain in the a$$ bathroom from bright green to brown. We got new light fixtures for the kitchen and master bathroom and they're now in place. For now, however, Elvis still lives on in the house. I don't know what kind of gold fetish the house designer had, but our shower and several other items in the house are so shiny gold that the King of Rock and Roll himself would be proud to call our place home! I know I have to be realistic and change these things little by little, but it's so hard not to just come in, guns blazing, changing every light fixture and faucet in the house! I am still holding out hope that I will win the $5,000 gift card to Home Depot that I registered for after we purchased our new kitchen chandelier.

I also still need to have dining room furniture (including a glass case that was my grandmother's that I adore) into the new house, but we're still trying to get rid of the furniture that is currently in there. Billy's mother's dining room furniture needs a new home (fast!) if anyone is interested! Once the new furniture is in the dining room, I will be able to display all of my wedding china, crystal and barware. I am pretty excited about having a dining room and having a place to put all of my pretty things that I never use on display.

What Were We Thinking?

A few months ago, everyone in the world had something to say about us getting a puppy right before we had a baby. This blog post is not the "you were right" that you people might be hoping for. While Berry is our little devil child, we still love her and think that it was the right decision and time for us to add to our ever-growing family.

No, this post is to discuss what Billy and I were thinking when we decided to move into a new house before the baby came. Today is June 7, which means that I am due exactly ONE month from today. We are currently waiting on my in-laws to move their stuff out so that we can move our stuff in, but they have been married for 40+ years, so they have LOTS of stuff. The closer we get to D-day, the more anxious I get that we may not be fully IN our current house or our new house when baby Carter comes. Billy, of course, does not understand the overwhelming urge to ready the baby's room and clean the house and have everything in order.

I am trying to remain calm, but it is not in my nature to be calm. I am an anxious and controlling person by nature. I do not thrive in chaos, and I feel my life is filled with chaos right now. I woke up at 4 a.m. today and was not able to go back to sleep because my mind was racing.

Yesterday, my two oldest and best friends threw me a baby shower and the move was the topic of conversation, it seemed. Every single person asked me when we were moving and I felt such anxiety at not being able to give a definite answer (to them or to myself) that I literally worked myself into a panic. I slept from 12 until 4. I am pretty sure I am supposed to be getting my sleep now, while I can, but I am finding it more and more difficult to do that!

Wish us luck!

Changes are coming!

As most of my avid readers know, I am having a baby this summer and Billy and I are over the moon about it. Baby Carter is just the first of the big changes that are headed our way, though. We are moving into a new house within the next several weeks and putting our first home on the market and behind us. I am really excited about the new house, but it definitely needs some touches so that I can make this house my own home. Lucky for me, I think Billy is afraid that I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown (and he may be right) so when we went to Home Depot yesterday, he didn't even blink when I insisted on changing every single cabinet handle in the house. We bought 62 cabinet handles and headed straight for lighting, where I convinced Billy that we simply had to replace the ceiling fan in the living room. I will post before and after pics as we go, but for now, feast your eyes on our first change. I loathed these cabinet handles. They were just not my style. Now we have simple ones that are much more my taste.

GOODBYE

HELLO

More Progress

Well, we got the dresser for Carter's nursery. I was disheartened immediately when I saw the box that it came in. It was MUCH smaller than the dresser itself, which could only mean one thing: that it was completely disassembled. Billy and I opened the box on Friday and my suspicions were immediately confirmed. The dresser was in no less than one million pieces. I mean, if you are going to purchase a dresser for hundreds of dollars, is it really too much to ask that the dresser come assembled? I understand the need for the crib to come with assembly required, because you would not be able to fit it through doorways and whatnot, but there is no excuse for the dresser coming disassembled. It was a nightmare.

Needless to say, the dresser was not as pleasant an experience for us. We did not, I am afraid, get through its assembly without a fight. Nevertheless, we conquered the dresser. It is completely assembled and the baby now has a place for all of his teeny clothes and I can finally start to relax because I can now start to organize all of his things.

On an unrelated note, the husband's baseball team has advanced to the Region Finals. They need to win on Friday in order to advance to the State Tournament, but it is really exciting. I have come a long way since Billy and I first married. I HATED baseball. I thought it was about as interesting as watching grass grow. I did not attend a baseball game until our second year of marriage and even then, I probably only went to one or two games. Now, I find myself at nearly every game when the weather is nice. (I am still not supportive enough to brave the elements for a ball game. I think I will only go to freezing cold or sweltering hot games when I have a child out on the field). High school sports are so much more fun to watch than professional sports, particularly baseball. I have come to realize that part of the reason I hated baseball before, was that my husband, a former pitcher, likes to watch games with amazing pitching...which equals few hits. That is boring to me still. Plus, in high school and college, kids care about the sport. They are playing for the pride of winning, not for money or contracts. Whatever the reason, I have become a fan of Billy's little baseball team. They are cute as pie. I have even learned most of the starters' names. I am one step away from a BHS shirt and some jean shorts (the seemingly required baseball parent uniform). Okay, that may be a stretch, but I really am excited for these boys. I will keep everyone posted!

Here it is...

Carter's manly stuffed animal :)

The finished product (it could use some ironing)

It's Carter's crib :)

I meant for this picture to be first but I am a blogging idiot so I don't know how to fix it. This is what the crib looked like sans bedding.

For those of you who want to see Carter's new crib and bedding but are not on facebook, here is a little preview of his nursery.

Yay!

Our crib came in yesterday so Billy and I headed up to Babies R Us to pick it up. It weighed about a thousand pounds so lucky Billy had to flex his muscles and get it in the house all by himself. Let me just say a little something about Babies R Us that about sent me over the edge. My wonderful in-laws bought Carter's crib for him and it was expensive. When we got to Babies R Us, the sales associate asked us if we wanted to PURCHASE a warranty for the bed. WHAT??? This bed cost a fortune and you have to pay MORE for a warranty? What a rip off! I was totally peeved about that. If something happens to this bed, Babies R Us will receive a strongly worded letter from this momma, because I was not about to pay EXTRA for a dang warranty! This product should have a warranty just because of the sheer cost alone! Not to mention the business we are bringing to Babies R Us. I registered there and all of my expensive furniture is from there, too. I guess they can do whatever they want because aside from Target, there are few places you can really get what you want and need for a baby.

Anyway, all griping aside, the crib looks adorable! I don't have the bedding on it yet but I will post pictures soon of the finished product. The crib assembly went surprisingly smoothly and Billy and I were able to get it done in about 40 minutes and we didn't even get into an argument. I think this is a good sign, because I don't know how many of you have tried to assemble things or do home projects like this with your spouse, but they often go awry and couples end up at each other's throats. For example, when Billy and I were hanging our large wedding portraits, I wanted one on either side of this door in our house, and I of course wanted them to be perfectly level. Billy got our laser level out and instructed me to hold one of the pictures (that weighs a ton) while he tried to figure out the level. My hand slipped and it was like the beginning of World War III. I think it is funny (now) that we got into such an enormous fight hanging our beautiful wedding pictures.

I think it's a good sign that the crib assembly was relatively easy and I can't wait to get the rest of the furniture. Tonight, my sister and the girls came over and helped me put together my "travel system." I like to refer to this stroller/carseat as the baby SUV. I am getting so excited now that Carter's nursery is coming along and he has started to get some of his bigger necessities! I am so thankful that my sister is handy because I am not sure I would've been able to figure out putting this thing together. Also, one of the first things I saw in the instruction booklet said "avoid finger entrapment." I have an intense fear and hatred of squishing my fingers so that warning alone sent me over the edge. I imagine that many people complained of severed digits and broken fingers and nails before that warning made the instruction manual! The SUV looks really cute. I will post pics of it soon, too.

Also, today, I took both Berry and Buster to the vet (brave) for Buster to get a pedicure and for Berry to get her 12 week shots and we ran into our friend, Mabel and her parents, Jared and Kelly! We were so excited because we had never seen Mabel in person. She is so cute! I am pretty sure my vet hated me because I just stood in the hallway with Kelly while he took care of Berry. Oh well, he isn't very friendly anyway. Berry and Buster prefer Dr. Kahn. She is cool. Mabel and Berry played for a while in the parking lot and Berry finally got a taste of her own medicine because Mabel took her out several times with a right hook. If I had to guess, I would say Mabel pinned Berry on her back 50 times. Berry was no match for her large breed friend. I think Buster took great pleasure in this whipping that Berry took since she constantly pounces on his face and bites him relentlessly.

All in all, we have had a successful and fun past few days (work aside, of course). Everyone have a good weekend!